13 Bible Verses about Sarcasm

And Herod with his soldiers despised him with contempt, and mocked him. They arrayed him in magnificent apparel. Then they sent him back to Pilate.

Jesus came out, wearing the crown of thorns and the purple garment. Pilate said: Look, the man!

They cried out: Away with him, away with him, impale him! Pilate asked: Should I impale your King? The chief priests answered: We have no king but Caesar.

The soldiers braided a crown of thorns and put it on his head. They dressed him in a purple garment. They came to him, and said: Hail, King of the Jews! They struck him with their hands.

They took off his clothes and dressed him in a scarlet robe. They made a crown of thorns and put it on his head. They placed a rod in his right hand. Then they bowed down on their knees before him. They mocked him, saying: Long life to the King of the Jews.

Jehoash king of Israel sent to Amaziah king of Judah, saying: The thorn-tree in Lebanon sent to the cedar in Lebanon, saying: 'Give your daughter to my son for a wife.' A beast from the woodland in Lebanon went by, crushing the thorn under his feet. It is true that you have overcome Edom and your heart is uplifted. Let that glory be enough for you and stay in your own country. Why do you make causes for trouble, putting yourself and Judah with you in danger of downfall?

King Jehoash of Israel sent this message to King Amaziah of Judah: A thistle in Lebanon sent a message to a cedar in Lebanon. It said: 'Let your daughter marry my son, but a wild animal from Lebanon came along and trampled the thistle. You say you defeated Edom. Now you have become arrogant enough to look for more fame. Stay home! Why must you invite disaster and your own defeat and take Judah with you?'

Go and cry out to the gods you have chosen! Let them save you in your time of trouble.

You will eat it for a whole month, until it comes out of your nose, until you are sick of it. This will happen because you have rejected Jehovah who is here among you and have complained to him that you should not have left Egypt.'

And now, make an agreement with my master, the king of Assyria, and I will give you two thousand horses, if you are able to put horsemen on them. How then can you put to shame the least of my master's servants? You put your hope in Egypt for chariots and horsemen:

Doubtless you are the people, and wisdom will die with you! I have a mind as well as you! I am not inferior to you! Who does not know all these things?

Joshua answered: If you are a great people, then get to the wood country, and cut down for yourself there in the land of the Perizzites and of the giants, if mount Ephraim is too narrow for you.

They said to Nahash the Ammonite: Tomorrow we will surrender to you. You may do to us whatever you think is right.

The king of Israel responded: It is said, let not the one who puts on his armor boast like the one who takes it off.

Eliab, David's oldest brother, heard David talking to the men. Then Eliab became angry with David. Why did you come here, he asked him, and with whom did you leave those few sheep in the wilderness? I know how overconfident and headstrong you are. You came here just to see the battle.

An empty headed man can no more become wise than a wild donkey's colt can be born a man.

Jotham heard about this. He stood on top of Mount Gerizim and shouted out to them: Men of Shechem, listen to me and God may listen to you! The trees went out to anoint a king over them. They said to the olive tree: 'Be our king.' The olive tree answered: 'I would have to stop producing my oil in order to govern you. My oil is used to honor gods and human beings.' read more.
Then the trees said to the fig tree: 'Come and be our king.' The fig tree replied: 'I would have to stop producing my good sweet fruit that I may govern you.' Then the trees spoke to the grapevine: 'You come and be our king.' But the vine answered: 'I could not govern you for I would have to stop producing my wine. It makes gods and human beings happy.' So then all the trees said to the thorn bush: 'You come and be our king! The thorn bush answered: 'If you really want to make me your king, then come and take shelter in my shade. If you do not, fire will blaze out of my thorny branches and burn up the cedars of Lebanon.' Think about it, Jotham continued: 'Were you really honest and sincere when you made Abimelech king? Have you respected Gideon's memory? Did you treat his family properly, as his actions deserved? My father fought for you. He risked his life to deliver you from the Midianites. Today you turned against my father's family. You killed his sons, seventy men on a single stone. And this because Abimelech, his son by his servant woman, is your relative, you have made him king of Shechem. If you have acted in truth and sincerity today to Gideon and his family then be happy with Abimelech and let him be happy with you.

In the middle of the day, Elijah made sport of them, saying: Give louder cries, for he is a god; he may be deep in thought. He may have gone away for some purpose. Perhaps he is on a journey. By chance he is sleeping and must be woke up.

And in the hearing of his countrymen and the army of Samaria he said: What are these feeble Jews doing? Will they make themselves strong? Will they make offerings? Will they get the work done in a day? Will they make the stones that have been burned come again out of the dust? Now Tobiah the Ammonite was with him, and he said: Such is their building that if a fox climbs to the top of it, their stonewall will be broken down.

David answered: I danced to honor Jehovah. He chose me to be king instead of your father and his family. He made me the leader of his people Israel. I will continue to dance and honor Jehovah.

They also complained to Moses: Was there not enough room in Egypt to bury us? Is that why you brought us out here to die in the desert? Why did you bring us out of Egypt?

Therefore, run away to your place now. I said: I will honor you greatly, but Jehovah has held you back from honor.

Then Agrippa said to Paul: In a short time you would persuade (convince) me to become a Christian.

The lazy man is wiser in his own conceit than seven men who can answer with good sense.

On the seventh day, before Samson went into the bedroom, the men of the city said to him: What could be sweeter than honey? What could be stronger than a lion? Samson replied: If you had not been plowing with my cow, you would not know the answer now.

Refuse false stories and old wives' fables. Train yourself with godliness in mind.

Jehovah asked Cain: Where is your brother Abel? I do not know, he replied. Am I my brother's keeper?