in fact I told myself it was the sentence of death. But that was to make me rely not on myself but on the God who raises the dead;

My proud boast is the testimony of my conscience that holiness and godly sincerity, not worldly cunning but the grace of God, have marked my conduct in the outside world and in particular my relations with you.

By the good faith of God, my word to you was not 'yes and no';

for the Son of God, Jesus Christ, who was proclaimed among you by us (by myself and Silvanus and Timotheus) was not 'yes and no' ??the divine 'yes' has at last sounded in him,

(Not that we lord it over your faith ??no, we co-operate for your joy: you have a standing of your own in the faith.)

I decided I would not pay you another painful visit.

So the very reason I wrote was that I might not come only to be pained by those who ought to give me joy; I relied on you all, I felt sure that my joy would be a joy for everyone of you.

For I wrote you in sore distress and misery of heart, with many a tear ??not to pain you but to convince you of my love, my special love for you.

If a certain individual has been causing pain, he has been causing pain not so much to me as to all of you ??at anyrate (for I am not going to overstate the case) to a section of you.

my spirit could not rest, because I did not find Titus my brother there; so I said goodbye and went off to Macedonia.

I am, for I am not like most, adulterating the word of God; like a man of sincerity, like a man of God, I speak the word in Christ before the very presence of God.

Am I beginning again to 'commend' myself? Do I need, like some people, to be commended by written certificates either to you or from you?

you make it obvious that you are a letter of Christ which I have been employed to inscribe, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of the human heart.

It is not that I am personally qualified to form any judgment by myself; my qualifications come from God,

and he has further qualified me to be the minister of a new covenant ??a covenant not of written law but of spirit; for the written law kills but the Spirit makes alive.

Now if the administration of death which was engraved in letters of stone, was invested with glory ??so much so, that the children of Israel could not gaze at the face of Moses on account of the dazzling glory that was fading from his face;

Such being my hope then, I am quite frank and open ??13 not like Moses, who used to hang a veil over his face to keep the children of Israel from gazing at the last rays of a fading glory.

I disown those practices which very shame conceals from view; I do not go about it craftily; I do not falsify the word of God; I state the truth openly and so commend myself to every man's conscience before God.

(It is Christ Jesus as Lord, not myself, that I proclaim; I am simply a servant of yours for Jesus' sake.)

But I possess this treasure in a frail vessel of earth, to show that the transcending power belongs to God, not to myself;

on every side I am harried but not hemmed in, perplexed but not despairing,

persecuted but not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed ??10 wherever I go, I am being killed in the body as Jesus was, so that the life of Jesus may come out in my body:

for those of us whose eyes are on the unseen, not on the seen; for the seen is transient, the unseen eternal.

since I am sure that once so covered I shall not be 'naked' at the hour of death.

I do sigh within this tent of mine with heavy anxiety ??not that I want to be stripped, no, but to be under the cover of the other, to have my mortal element absorbed by life.

This is not 'recommending myself to you again'; it is giving you an incentive to be proud of me, which you can use against men who are proud of externals instead of the inward reality.

I appeal to you too, as a worker with God, do not receive the grace of God in vain.

I put no obstacle in the path of any, so that my ministry may not be discredited;

'unknown' but well-known, dying but here I am alive, chastened but not killed,

'Restraint'? ??that lies with you, not me.

Therefore come away from them, separate, saith the Lord, touch not what is unclean; then I will receive you,

I am not saying this to condemn you. Condemn you? Why, I repeat, you are in my very heart, and you will be there in death and life alike.

In fact, if I did pain you by that letter, I do not regret it. I did regret it when I discovered that my letter had pained you even for the time being,

but I am glad now ??not glad that you were pained but glad that your pain induced you to repent. For you were pained as God meant you to be pained, and so you got no harm from what I did;

So my letter was written to you, not on account of the offender nor for the sake of the injured party, but in order to let you realize before God how seriously you do care for me.

I told him of my pride in you, and I have not been disappointed. No, just as all I have had to say to you has been true, so all I said about you to Titus, all my pride in you, has also proved true.

I am not issuing any orders, only using the zeal of others to prove how sterling your own love is.

But I will tell you what I think about it; it is to your interest to go on with this enterprise, for you started it last year, you were the first not merely to do anything but to want to do anything.

If only one is ready to give, according to his means, it is acceptable; he is not asked to give what he has not got.

This does not mean that other people are to be relieved and you to suffer:

Thus it is to give and take ??as it is written, He who got much had nothing over, and he who got little had not too little.

I aim at being above reproach not only from God but also from men.

in case any Macedonians accompany me and find you are not ready ??which would make me (not to speak of yourselves) ashamed of having been so sure.

That is why I have thought it necessary to ask these brothers to go on in advance and get your promised contribution ready in good time. I want it to be forthcoming as a generous gift, not as money wrung out of you.

I beg of you that when I do come I may not have to speak out and be peremptory; but my mind is made up to tackle certain people who have made up their minds that I move on the low level of the flesh.

I do live in the flesh, but I do not make war as the flesh does;

the weapons of my warfare are not weapons of the flesh, but divinely strong to demolish fortresses ??5 I demolish theories and any rampart thrown up to resist the knowledge of God, I take every project prisoner to make it obey Christ,

Even supposing I were to boast somewhat freely of my authority (and the Lord gave it to me for building you up, not for demolishing you), I would feel quite justified.

But I am not going to seem as if I were 'overawing you with a letter,' so to speak.

I do not venture to class myself or to compare myself with certain exalted individuals! They belong to the class of self-praisers; while I limit myself to my own sphere, I compare myself with my own standard,

I am not overstepping the limit, as if you lay beyond my sphere; I was the very first to reach you with the gospel of Christ.

I do not boast beyond my limits in a sphere where other men have done the work; my hope rather is that the growth of your faith will allow me to enlarge the range of my appointed sphere

for it is not the self-praiser with his own recommendations who is accepted, it is the man whom the Lord recommends.

You put up with it all right, when some interloper preaches a second Jesus (not the Jesus I preached), or when you are treated to a Spirit different from the Spirit you once received, and to a different gospel from what I gave you! Why not put up with me?

I hold I am not one whit inferior to these precious 'apostles'!

Why? Because I do not love you? God knows I do.

(What I am now going to say is not inspired by the Lord: I am in the role of a 'fool,' now, on this business of boasting.

I am quite ashamed to say I was not equal to that sort of thing! But let them vaunt as they please, I am equal to them (mind, this is the role of a fool!).

Ministers of Christ? yes perhaps, but not as much as I am (I am mad to talk like this!), with all my labours, with all my lashes, with all my time in prison ??a record longer far than theirs. I have been often at the point of death;

three times I have been beaten by the Romans, once pelted with stones, three times shipwrecked, adrift at sea for a whole night and day;

I have been often on my travels, I have been in danger from rivers and robbers, in danger from Jews and Gentiles, through dangers of town and of desert, through dangers on the sea, through dangers among false brothers ??27 through labour and hardship, through many a sleepless night, through hunger and thirst, starving many a time, cold and ill-clad, and all the rest of it.

Who is weak, and I do not feel his weakness? Whose faith is hurt, and I am not aglow with indignation?

I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago was caught up to the third heaven. In the body or out of the body? That I do not know: God knows.

Of an experience like that I am prepared to boast, but not of myself personally ??not except as regards my weaknesses.

Now this is playing the fool! But you forced me to it, instead of coming forward yourselves and vouching for me. That was what I deserved; for, 'nobody' as I am, I am not one whit inferior to these precious 'apostles.'

Where were you inferior to the rest of the churches? ??unless in this, that your apostle did not choose to make himself a burden to you. Pray pardon me this terrible wrong!

Here am I all ready to pay you my third visit. And I will not be a burden to you; I want yourselves and not your money. Children have not to put money by for their parents; that is what parents do for their children.

But let that pass, you say; I was not a burden to you, no, but I was clever enough to dupe you with my tricks? Was I?

I asked Titus to go, and with him I sent our brother. Titus did not make anything out of you, did he? And did not I act in the same spirit as he did? Did I not take the very same steps?

For I am afraid I may perhaps come and find you are not what I could wish, while you may find I am not what you could wish; I am afraid of finding quarrels, jealousy, temper, rivalry, slanders, gossiping, arrogance, and disorder ??21 afraid that when I come back to you, my God may humiliate me before you, and I may have to mourn for many who sinned some time ago and yet have never repented of the impurity, the sexual vice, and the sensuality which they have practised.

Put yourselves to the proof, not me; test yourselves, to see if you are in the faith. Do you not understand that Christ Jesus is within you? Otherwise you must be failures.

and I pray to God that you may not go wrong ??not to prove I am a success, that is not the point, but that you should come right, even if I seemed to be a failure.

I am writing thus to you in absence, so that when I do come I may not have to deal sharply with you; I have the Lord's authority for that, but he gave it to me for building you up, not for demolishing you.